The coaching mindset – believing in the acorn’s potential to become an oak tree

When entering a coaching partnership, the beliefs of the coach play a crucial role in shaping the effectiveness of the coaching relationship and the client’s progress.
Coaching, as defined by ICF, is “partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential”.
And guess what? If the coach doesn’t truly believe that people, including their clients, can maximize their personal and professional potential, I would argue that the foundation of the coaching relationship is already compromised.
When talking about the coaching mindset, one of the first things that comes to my mind is the acorn metaphor. It was used by Karen Horney, back in the 1950s, to describe that we, as humans, have the innate abilities to develop when provided with the right growing space and opportunities. The acorn might be small at the beginning, but it holds the remarkable potential to grow into a magnificent oak tree.
With that in mind, let’s look at 3 core beliefs that are part of the coaching mindset and some examples of how they might reflect on the coach – client interactions:

1) People are capable of learning and improving

Let’s say a coach is working with an NGO leader who says she’s not good at public speaking and feels overwhelmed by an upcoming presentation.
When the coach truly believes the NGO leader is capable of learning and improving, (s)he can ask questions such as: “What aspects of your public speaking skills would you like to improve?” and “What would need to happen to make those improvements?”. This approach focuses on creating an actionable plan to become better at public speaking and nail that presentation.
The coach can also ask, for example: “Can you recall a time when you successfully communicated your ideas to a group? What worked well then?” to encourage the NGO leader to identify her superpowers and focus on leveraging them for the upcoming event.

2) People are responsible for their own choices

Let’s take another example – a startup CEO is struggling to balance work and personal life, and he feels that there’s no time to do anything else than work.
With a strong belief that people are responsible for their own choices, the coach might ask: “What boundaries do you want to set to protect your personal time?” or “What are the most important aspects of your personal life that you want to prioritize?”. These questions empower the startup CEO to take ownership of his choices and actions, clarify what are his priorities and co-create an approach for future steps.
The coach can also ask, for instance: “How does your ideal day look like?” and
“What is the smallest step you can take today to get closer to your ideal day?”, helping the client visualize the ideal scenario and start making step-by-step changes towards the balanced life he desires.

3) People have a lot of potential and are not defined by their current performance

Imagine a coaching session where a sales manager says she’s disappointed after failing to meet a sales goal.
A coach who believes the sales manager has the potential to reach that goal can help her identify the challenges that appeared on the way and focus on a growth-mindset approach, asking: “What specific obstacles held you back from reaching your sales goal?” and “What can do you differently to overcome these challenges next quarter?”.
Believing the client has the potential to meet that sales goal, the coach can also help the sales manager reframe the experience, for example: “What did you learn from this experience that can help you in the future?” and “How can you use this setback as a stepping stone towards your goal?”. This approach reinforces the idea that the client’s potential is not defined by a single failure and she has the inner power to overcome the challenges and reach her goals.

To conclude, embracing the coaching mindset is similar to seeing the potential in every individual, just as we see the potential in a small acorn to grow into a mighty oak tree. When coaches truly believe in their clients’ ability to learn, improve, and take responsibility for their own lives, they create a powerful space for growth and transformation. This mindset not only fosters the development of the client, but also strengthens the foundation of the coaching relationship.

And now, a question for you, dear reader – how would the world look if we all had a coaching mindset? If we believed that we, and the people around us, are truly capable of learning and improving, that each of us is responsible for our own choices, and that our future is not defined by our current performance?